Pauline Victoria
I was recently exploring the fear factor. Fear is inevitable. But, I realized there are different kinds of fears. Some fears paralyze us and some fears push us to our potential. In looking at my own fear, I discovered that the fears I had actually pushed me to reach my full potential in embracing life.
The fear of being left on the sidelines of life was bigger than my fear of stretching out of my comfort zone. Up until I was 12 years old, I spent the summer on the steps of a swimming pool as my friends played in the deep end. I had it. I was tired of being left in the shallow end. So I was faced with a choice: do I play it safe and stay on the side steps of the shallow end or do I risk drowning as I learn to swim? I was more afraid of not being able to participate fully than I was of drowning. And so that fear of not being able to be free pushed me toward taking the risks. Day after day, gulp after gulp, I forged ahead and finally figured out how to swim and become free to play fully.
People face their fear of the unknown in order to put to rest their other fears. People leave their house not knowing what could happen rather than be isolated, people fly in planes trusting strangers with multiple lives rather than not experience adventure, people drive not knowing whether or not they could get in an accident rather than not have the freedom to go when and where they please, people allow themselves to fall in love whether or not they know if their heart will be broken rather than be alone.
Congratulations on facing your fears!
In every situation when you are faced with being paralyzed or pushed, ask yourself which fear is stronger: the fear of playing it safe to merely survive or the fear of taking some risks to truly live?
You may wonder why I posted this article. Pauline was born with no arms and no legs. Check out your website… it is inspirational!
www.paulinevictoria.com
Friday, April 29, 2011
Friday, April 22, 2011
Connecting or Just Communicating?
I read this article by Darren Hardy
Are You Connecting or Just Communicating?
It seems the networking series really seemed to connect with many of you. To continue the discussion and to introduce you to our May issue of SUCCESS with the social network star Mark Zuckerberg on the cover, below is my Publisher’s Letter from the issue. They key point is, you don’t need 1,000 ‘friends’ or even 100–see how many below…
I communicate a lot—on my blog, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube. I also process around 300-400 emails a day and who knows how many text messages.
But recently I spent some time sorting and categorizing my database of more than 10,000 “contacts,” and I had a startling realization. While I might be communicating with tens of thousands of people every day, outside of encounters with my immediate family and business team, I am not really connecting or fostering very many real relationships at all. I’m what’s called a mile wide and an inch deep, and that’s not how you strike oil! I’ve been mistaking communication for connection.
Since having this epiphany, I’ve noticed how many other people suffer from this same affliction, mistaking the time they spend transmitting and receiving information with time spent making meaningful connections. Don’t get me wrong—both communication and connection are essential today, but one simply does not equate to the other.
With the pace of business and life today, it’s so easy to fall victim to this way of thinking; we must move quickly and convey as much information as quickly as possible to stay competitive, or so we think. With all the opportunities technology provides—enabling us to work from just about anywhere and to expand our reach, quite literally, around the globe—it also has become a crutch in some ways.
I think true connection happens face to face, heart to heart, live and in person. Sharing the same physical space. Sharing an experience together. Even in a business context, I’m sure you’ve experienced the difference between having a meeting in person versus a conference call or the great limitations of communicating over email—not to mention the shallow experience of simply reading a Facebook update or a tweet.
A wise person once said: there are only a dozen or two relationships that will take you to any level of success you desire.
Think about that. Not 10,000, 1,000 or even 100. Ask Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, Richard Branson or Oprah Winfrey, and each of them will tell you that no more than two dozen relationships contributed to their extraordinary achievements today.
But you can’t just communicate with people in those two dozen relationships; you have to connect with them. These connections can only result from your continued efforts to nurture deep and meaningful relationships.
Are You Connecting or Just Communicating?
It seems the networking series really seemed to connect with many of you. To continue the discussion and to introduce you to our May issue of SUCCESS with the social network star Mark Zuckerberg on the cover, below is my Publisher’s Letter from the issue. They key point is, you don’t need 1,000 ‘friends’ or even 100–see how many below…
I communicate a lot—on my blog, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube. I also process around 300-400 emails a day and who knows how many text messages.
But recently I spent some time sorting and categorizing my database of more than 10,000 “contacts,” and I had a startling realization. While I might be communicating with tens of thousands of people every day, outside of encounters with my immediate family and business team, I am not really connecting or fostering very many real relationships at all. I’m what’s called a mile wide and an inch deep, and that’s not how you strike oil! I’ve been mistaking communication for connection.
Since having this epiphany, I’ve noticed how many other people suffer from this same affliction, mistaking the time they spend transmitting and receiving information with time spent making meaningful connections. Don’t get me wrong—both communication and connection are essential today, but one simply does not equate to the other.
With the pace of business and life today, it’s so easy to fall victim to this way of thinking; we must move quickly and convey as much information as quickly as possible to stay competitive, or so we think. With all the opportunities technology provides—enabling us to work from just about anywhere and to expand our reach, quite literally, around the globe—it also has become a crutch in some ways.
I think true connection happens face to face, heart to heart, live and in person. Sharing the same physical space. Sharing an experience together. Even in a business context, I’m sure you’ve experienced the difference between having a meeting in person versus a conference call or the great limitations of communicating over email—not to mention the shallow experience of simply reading a Facebook update or a tweet.
A wise person once said: there are only a dozen or two relationships that will take you to any level of success you desire.
Think about that. Not 10,000, 1,000 or even 100. Ask Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, Richard Branson or Oprah Winfrey, and each of them will tell you that no more than two dozen relationships contributed to their extraordinary achievements today.
But you can’t just communicate with people in those two dozen relationships; you have to connect with them. These connections can only result from your continued efforts to nurture deep and meaningful relationships.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Employee Praise
Easy Ways to Give Employee or Co-Worker Recognition
Employees' happiness is often the most important non-financial vital sign for a small business to monitor, says Jennifer Openshaw, author of The Millionaire Zone and other books for entrepreneurs and investors. "If they're not happy, it's going to impact your bottom line."
While conducting formal employee surveys is one way to measure employee morale, less-formal surveillance can produce useful results. "Just look on their faces and body language."
To infuse more life into your company, here are some unique ways to give employee recognition:
* Use the corporate intranet as a way to spread praise.
* A low-tech way to reward others is writing on whiteboards with dry erase markers. Author Tim Sanders points to a "Recognition Whiteboard" he observed at the British Columbia Lottery System. Anyone could scribble notes of recognition for other team members. Introverted types found the whiteboard a great way to thank each other for contributions to a project's success.
* Recognize employees' work anniversaries as a way to let them know how they've made a difference in the company.
* When inquiring about completed projects, managers should ask their project managers, "Who else helped you accomplish this?" It's a great way to broaden praise beyond the "face" of the project.
Employees' happiness is often the most important non-financial vital sign for a small business to monitor, says Jennifer Openshaw, author of The Millionaire Zone and other books for entrepreneurs and investors. "If they're not happy, it's going to impact your bottom line."
While conducting formal employee surveys is one way to measure employee morale, less-formal surveillance can produce useful results. "Just look on their faces and body language."
To infuse more life into your company, here are some unique ways to give employee recognition:
* Use the corporate intranet as a way to spread praise.
* A low-tech way to reward others is writing on whiteboards with dry erase markers. Author Tim Sanders points to a "Recognition Whiteboard" he observed at the British Columbia Lottery System. Anyone could scribble notes of recognition for other team members. Introverted types found the whiteboard a great way to thank each other for contributions to a project's success.
* Recognize employees' work anniversaries as a way to let them know how they've made a difference in the company.
* When inquiring about completed projects, managers should ask their project managers, "Who else helped you accomplish this?" It's a great way to broaden praise beyond the "face" of the project.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Discover Your Strengths
Discover Your Strengths
Love it or loathe it, that's how author Marcus Buckingham suggests finding your strengths. To help you identify your best traits and weaknesses, Buckingham suggests taking a blank sheet of paper and drawing a line down the middle. Label one side "Love it!" and the other side "Loathe it!"
During a typical week, carry the paper around with you and separate your activities into the two categories. In the love column are things you look forward to doing, tasks that seem to make the time fly by or activities that make you feel fulfilled after you've completed them. Tasks that are difficult to concentrate on and things you hope you never have to do again belong in the loathe column.
At the end of the week, you'll have a clear picture of your strengths and where your passion lies. Specifically identifying the activities that strengthen you will help you purposely gravitate toward them, as well as help you neutralize the ones you hate. You'll be able to avoid some of the activities that weaken you. For those you can't, by having your week so filled with activities that invigorate you, you'll have the strength to power through those activities that drain you.
Love it or loathe it, that's how author Marcus Buckingham suggests finding your strengths. To help you identify your best traits and weaknesses, Buckingham suggests taking a blank sheet of paper and drawing a line down the middle. Label one side "Love it!" and the other side "Loathe it!"
During a typical week, carry the paper around with you and separate your activities into the two categories. In the love column are things you look forward to doing, tasks that seem to make the time fly by or activities that make you feel fulfilled after you've completed them. Tasks that are difficult to concentrate on and things you hope you never have to do again belong in the loathe column.
At the end of the week, you'll have a clear picture of your strengths and where your passion lies. Specifically identifying the activities that strengthen you will help you purposely gravitate toward them, as well as help you neutralize the ones you hate. You'll be able to avoid some of the activities that weaken you. For those you can't, by having your week so filled with activities that invigorate you, you'll have the strength to power through those activities that drain you.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Networking
Networking is a tool that can provide a great opportunity to build your business, at the same time it is a skill that does not come naturally to everyone. Have you ever been at a function and felt nervous or uncomfortable talking with others? Have you ever collected contact information, but never reached out to that person after the event was over? Today, we will discuss how to use networking effectively and how to get the most out of it.
Looking for events? Try volunteering. Getting involved with a place of worship or a charitable organization is a great way to meet new people and establish contacts. Another way is to join your local Chamber of Commerce, just make sure you follow your company’s rules about doing so.
Prepare for the event. Make sure that you arrive at the event with a large supply of business cards and any flyers you have on hand. Have a plan in your mind, what is your goal for this event? Bring any business builder tools you may have such as CDs and DVDs, workbooks, etc.
Be Genuine. Just as you know in social situations when someone is mingling for personal gain, others will know if you do it. Be honest, respectful and genuine in your conversations. Listen to others and show them the same respect they show you.
Educate, don’t sell. When talking about yourself and your business, make sure to inform and educate your audience rather than trying to sell your opportunity. This provides you with the chance to build relationships and to gain interest without hard selling.
Connect. Listen to others for common ground ¬¬¬and common interests. These common interests provide a great basis on which to build relationships.
Be happy, be useful. Always be positive and happy when networking. Provide useful information and introduction whenever possible. As you establish yourself as the person to know at events, you can connect better with individuals.
Deal with Rejection. An introduction doesn’t always go the way you would like, some people aren’t interested. Don’t get discouraged, just move on. Remember the Golden Rule “One should treat others, as one would like others to treat oneself.”
Ask to be introduced. If you are new to a situation ask to be introduced. This allows you to establish contacts quickly and get a third person’s perspective on who is important to know. ¬¬¬
Be Brief. People will remember your information better if it is shorter. The longer you talk, the more difficult it is to maintain focus. Prepare a short synopsis about yourself and your business ahead of time.
Follow up. Make sure that once the event is over and you have collected the business cards of the people you have met, reach out to them, either with a phone call or a personally written note.
Looking for events? Try volunteering. Getting involved with a place of worship or a charitable organization is a great way to meet new people and establish contacts. Another way is to join your local Chamber of Commerce, just make sure you follow your company’s rules about doing so.
Prepare for the event. Make sure that you arrive at the event with a large supply of business cards and any flyers you have on hand. Have a plan in your mind, what is your goal for this event? Bring any business builder tools you may have such as CDs and DVDs, workbooks, etc.
Be Genuine. Just as you know in social situations when someone is mingling for personal gain, others will know if you do it. Be honest, respectful and genuine in your conversations. Listen to others and show them the same respect they show you.
Educate, don’t sell. When talking about yourself and your business, make sure to inform and educate your audience rather than trying to sell your opportunity. This provides you with the chance to build relationships and to gain interest without hard selling.
Connect. Listen to others for common ground ¬¬¬and common interests. These common interests provide a great basis on which to build relationships.
Be happy, be useful. Always be positive and happy when networking. Provide useful information and introduction whenever possible. As you establish yourself as the person to know at events, you can connect better with individuals.
Deal with Rejection. An introduction doesn’t always go the way you would like, some people aren’t interested. Don’t get discouraged, just move on. Remember the Golden Rule “One should treat others, as one would like others to treat oneself.”
Ask to be introduced. If you are new to a situation ask to be introduced. This allows you to establish contacts quickly and get a third person’s perspective on who is important to know. ¬¬¬
Be Brief. People will remember your information better if it is shorter. The longer you talk, the more difficult it is to maintain focus. Prepare a short synopsis about yourself and your business ahead of time.
Follow up. Make sure that once the event is over and you have collected the business cards of the people you have met, reach out to them, either with a phone call or a personally written note.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
J-O-B is a four-letter word
See what you think about this article I read:
When J-O-B Is a Four-Letter Word and How to Change That
In his bestselling book The Three Signs of a Miserable Job, Patrick Lencioni quotes a Gallup poll finding that 70 percent of American workers don’t like their jobs. According to Lencioni, “The primary source of job misery and the potential cure for that misery resides in the hands of one individual—the direct manager.”
Three conditions that create a miserable job:
1. Anonymity or “the feeling that employees get when they realize their manager has little interest in them as a human being.”
2. Irrelevance, which takes root when employees cannot see how their job makes a difference in the lives of others.
3. “Immeasurement” which is the inability of employees to assess for themselves their contribution or success.
Three ways to avoid job burnout and make yourself happy at work:
1. Use Trapped Downtime. If you’re at risk of burnout from boredom, find ways to fill trapped downtime with something enriching or uplifting. Fill your MP3 player with a good book or advice from a personal-development expert for when you’re stuck in traffic on the way to work. Read about trends in your industry and examples of how your job, your company and your industry are making a real difference in others’ lives. And we know you’re guilty of it because we are too, but don’t eat lunch at your desk. Get out to exercise, socialize, attend a brown-bag seminar or other way to enrich yourself.
2. Start Saying No. (But Do It Politely.) You know your workload and capacity best, so when you’re in danger of burnout from overwork, start saying no. Determine your highest priorities and make progress on those first. Achieving checkmarks on your priority list will give you something measurable to appreciate and invigorate you for new projects down the road.
3. Show Your Human Side. You’re not a robot, so quit trying to be. When something seems unethical, speak up. When something seems counterproductive, offer a solution. When something whole-heartedly tanks your job morale, share your concerns. When managers see your more personable side, they may break past seeing you as just another employee and view you as a conscientious, dedicated professional.
Blessings!
When J-O-B Is a Four-Letter Word and How to Change That
In his bestselling book The Three Signs of a Miserable Job, Patrick Lencioni quotes a Gallup poll finding that 70 percent of American workers don’t like their jobs. According to Lencioni, “The primary source of job misery and the potential cure for that misery resides in the hands of one individual—the direct manager.”
Three conditions that create a miserable job:
1. Anonymity or “the feeling that employees get when they realize their manager has little interest in them as a human being.”
2. Irrelevance, which takes root when employees cannot see how their job makes a difference in the lives of others.
3. “Immeasurement” which is the inability of employees to assess for themselves their contribution or success.
Three ways to avoid job burnout and make yourself happy at work:
1. Use Trapped Downtime. If you’re at risk of burnout from boredom, find ways to fill trapped downtime with something enriching or uplifting. Fill your MP3 player with a good book or advice from a personal-development expert for when you’re stuck in traffic on the way to work. Read about trends in your industry and examples of how your job, your company and your industry are making a real difference in others’ lives. And we know you’re guilty of it because we are too, but don’t eat lunch at your desk. Get out to exercise, socialize, attend a brown-bag seminar or other way to enrich yourself.
2. Start Saying No. (But Do It Politely.) You know your workload and capacity best, so when you’re in danger of burnout from overwork, start saying no. Determine your highest priorities and make progress on those first. Achieving checkmarks on your priority list will give you something measurable to appreciate and invigorate you for new projects down the road.
3. Show Your Human Side. You’re not a robot, so quit trying to be. When something seems unethical, speak up. When something seems counterproductive, offer a solution. When something whole-heartedly tanks your job morale, share your concerns. When managers see your more personable side, they may break past seeing you as just another employee and view you as a conscientious, dedicated professional.
Blessings!
Monday, March 7, 2011
5 Simple Steps to Squash Your Stress
5 Simple Steps to Squash Your Stress
by Noah St. John
Stress is caused by a lack of perceived control. The more control we perceive we have in our lives, the less stress we feel.
That's one reason that the major life changes bring about the most stress. For example: getting married, buying a new home...
Wow, I'm doing both of those in the next 65 days. No wonder this is on my mind :)
With any life change, we often feel a loss of perceived control. The bigger the change, the more loss of perceived control, the greater the stress.
So here are 5 simple steps to squash your stress:
1. Use AFFORMATIONS.
Afformations are empowering questions you can use to lower your stress immediately.
For example, Afformations like:
"Why am I so calm?"
"Why am I so confident?"
"Why did everything work out better than I thought?"
These empowering questions cause your mind to search for answers - which effectively switches on your internal stress-relief button.
2. Install your Introspection System.
Like your house and your body, your life and business are made up of SYSTEMS that must operate effectively for you to lower your stress. Installing your Introspection System means you make the time to do things like meditate, journal, walk in nature every day. You want to make sure that the ladder of success you're climbing is leaning against the right wall.
3. Rate yourself from 1-10.
Let's say a really stressful event would be a 10 on a 10 scale - things like the major life changes I listed above. The problem is, we often act as if getting dinner ready were a 10! Next time you feel stressed, ask yourself, "What am I right now?" Rate yourself from 1-10, 10 being "Stressed out of my gourd." Then, ask yourself if the situation really warrants that kind of reaction. The BEST way to do this with a spouse or accountability partner.
4. Find Your No.
A lot of stress comes from over-committing. Remember that time you said yes when you really wanted to say no? That's called added stress. Next time someone asks you to do something you don't really want to do, just notice it. Then learn to say no with a smile. Saying no is like a muscle. You can build it with time and practice.
5. Finally... Breathe!
This sounds so simple, and it is. Sometimes we forget to breathe!
The healthiest way to breathe to lower stress is:
1. Breathe in through your nose.
2. Hold for 3-5 seconds.
3. Blow out through your mouth.
Try it right now. You will feel better instantly.
The health benefits of proper breathing are well-documented: better respiratory function, more balanced nervous system, healthier digestive system, even younger-looking skin. And of course, just think of the alternative :-)
by Noah St. John
Stress is caused by a lack of perceived control. The more control we perceive we have in our lives, the less stress we feel.
That's one reason that the major life changes bring about the most stress. For example: getting married, buying a new home...
Wow, I'm doing both of those in the next 65 days. No wonder this is on my mind :)
With any life change, we often feel a loss of perceived control. The bigger the change, the more loss of perceived control, the greater the stress.
So here are 5 simple steps to squash your stress:
1. Use AFFORMATIONS.
Afformations are empowering questions you can use to lower your stress immediately.
For example, Afformations like:
"Why am I so calm?"
"Why am I so confident?"
"Why did everything work out better than I thought?"
These empowering questions cause your mind to search for answers - which effectively switches on your internal stress-relief button.
2. Install your Introspection System.
Like your house and your body, your life and business are made up of SYSTEMS that must operate effectively for you to lower your stress. Installing your Introspection System means you make the time to do things like meditate, journal, walk in nature every day. You want to make sure that the ladder of success you're climbing is leaning against the right wall.
3. Rate yourself from 1-10.
Let's say a really stressful event would be a 10 on a 10 scale - things like the major life changes I listed above. The problem is, we often act as if getting dinner ready were a 10! Next time you feel stressed, ask yourself, "What am I right now?" Rate yourself from 1-10, 10 being "Stressed out of my gourd." Then, ask yourself if the situation really warrants that kind of reaction. The BEST way to do this with a spouse or accountability partner.
4. Find Your No.
A lot of stress comes from over-committing. Remember that time you said yes when you really wanted to say no? That's called added stress. Next time someone asks you to do something you don't really want to do, just notice it. Then learn to say no with a smile. Saying no is like a muscle. You can build it with time and practice.
5. Finally... Breathe!
This sounds so simple, and it is. Sometimes we forget to breathe!
The healthiest way to breathe to lower stress is:
1. Breathe in through your nose.
2. Hold for 3-5 seconds.
3. Blow out through your mouth.
Try it right now. You will feel better instantly.
The health benefits of proper breathing are well-documented: better respiratory function, more balanced nervous system, healthier digestive system, even younger-looking skin. And of course, just think of the alternative :-)
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